CLASSY-FIED ADS
The following are actual excerpts from classified sections of city
newspapers.
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Illiterate? Write today for free help.
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Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us
once, you'll never go anywhere again.
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Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced
yard, meals, and smacks included.
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Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
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Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing
to travel.
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Stock up and save. Limit: one.
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Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
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3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience
preferred.
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Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round
bottom for efficient beating.
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Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head
illusion. Blue Cross and salary.
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Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25;
Children $2.00
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For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick
legs and large drawers.
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Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an
extra pair to take home, too.
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We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it
carefully by hand.
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For sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.
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Great Dames for sale.
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Have several very old dresses from grandmother in
beautiful condition.
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Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
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Get rid of aunts. Zap does the job in 24 hours.
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Toaster: A gift that every member of the family
appreciates. Automatically burns toast.
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For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
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Man, honest. Will take anything.
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Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here
first.
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Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find
person.
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Wanted: Hair cutter. Excellent growth potential.
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Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or
drink.
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Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
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Wanted. Widower with school age children requires
person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be
capable of contributing to growth of family.
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And now, the Superstore-unequaled in size, unmatched in
variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
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We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in
your home for $1.00.
(thanx to: Richie R. @ auckland.ac.nz)